Something more
by Phaelas
Summary: Summary: Hiih loves, and Duncan lies. Warning: SLASH. If this is not your thing, don’t read this.


Title: Something more  
Author: Las  
Pairing: Duncan Idaho/Hiih Resser  
Rating: PG-13  
Summary: Hiih loves, and Duncan lies.  
Warning: SLASH. If this is not your thing, don't read this. Flames waste your time and mine.

Extra information for those of you who don't remember exactly who Hiih is:  
Hiih was sent to the Ginaz swordmasters school (by duke Moritani of the planet Grumman) in the same year Duncan was, and they became good friends. Then Moritani kidnapped and murdered some relatives of the leader of another great house, and Hiih and the other Grumman trainees get a choice: either they leave the school, or they swear off their Grumman heritage and will be allowed to stay.

* * *

In this place, it was never silent. Even when everyone had gone to sleep, had settled in their small tents, the rain dripped and splashed and soaked the earth. This was not the first night the trainees wondered if they'd ever be dry again.

But tonight, that was not the main thing on Hiih's mind. He laid on his back in the tent he shared with his best friend, staring into the darkness that surrounded him. Today, he had sworn off his heritage. Today, he had chosen to belong to no one and nothing, nothing but this school and the training it provided. Things changed. But they would have changed either way.

He knew he wouldn't regret his choice.

Hiih shifted a little, trying to comfort his back, stiff from the training exercises. After weeks of studying poetry and ancient philosophy, his body tired more easily and had to get used to the heavy exercises again. With a sigh he inched closer to his friend, laying on the cot beside him. _Duncan._

The body beside him stirred at his movement and turned, and a moment later he felt Duncan's gaze resting on his face.

"Can't sleep, Resser?"

Hiih's lips turned into a smile of their own accord. "Nah…" he responded softly, just loud for his friend to hear him above the sound of the rain, then added a little worried: "Did I wake you?" Duncan always seemed to sleep with one eye open, always alert to any impending danger. Hiih knew his friend's horrid past loomed around every corner.

"No, I was just thinking," Duncan responded with a sigh. "They didn't push us hard enough today." Hiih could hear the smile in the other's voice as he continued: "Otherwise I would have slept."

Hiih snorted softly. "Just because of an additional half-an-hour break, you'd call this day lenient?"

"Well the day sure wasn't lenient for our peace of mind. They should have pushed us harder to compensate."

The young Grumman who was Grumman no longer remained quiet for a long moment. A harder training would have sent him into the bliss of deep sleep, perhaps, but he needed to be aware of his choice. He had abandoned his home. His mind was full, as was his heart: the dull feeling of loss, mixed with pride... and something else, something that should never have been of such importance to him, but that was nevertheless. "I don't regret my choice."

Duncan sighed into the darkness. "I know you don't. But that doesn't mean it's not hard." Duncan shifted under his cover to lay on his side and Hiih inched back to give him more room, but a firm arm slid around him and pulled him back. "If it means anything to you, I would have missed you terribly had you left."

Hiih's face broke into an unseen smile. "You would have been fine."

"It would have been different." Duncan rested his forehead against Hiih's own.

The redhead hesitated, then moved even closer to his friend's body until they laid chest to chest, only their thin blankets between them, and Hiih closed his eyes. "I would have stayed had it just been for you."

When all remained quiet except for the thunderous sound of the water that came cascading down from the always thick layer of clouds, he wondered if he perhaps shouldn't have said that. After all, Duncan's reasons for being here were so much nobler than his own. His black-haired friend had put his life in service of the Atreides, the family that had welcomed him in their household after he had escaped their greatest enemy, the Harkonnens. _And what do I fight for? _

"My dearest Hiih," the other interrupted his thoughts, his warm breath tickling Hiih's skin as he spoke, and he hesitated shortly. "I admire you."

"I am not that special, Duncan," the redhead said quietly.

It wasn't true, of course. He was one of the best out here, a smart mind with quick reflexes and great skill. One of the few that could remain standing when fighting the harshly trained Idaho. But that just wasn't enough.

Duncan's arm closed around him tighter. "Don't say that. You're the only one who stayed, the only one who was brave enough to oppose his own family." He took a deep breath. "_And_… you're the only one that I feel understands me. To me, you'll always be special."

Hiih swallowed. Of course he had wanted to hear that. _I long for you, Duncan. Can't you read me? I love you, dammit! Special isn't enough... _He could… he could just do it. As the thoughts hammered in his mind, his breathing quickened, and he was suddenly very much aware of his hand resting on Duncan's chest. The pulse beat steadily under his palm. _Do it, Resser. Just do it. Do it! _

He tilted his head carefully, then ever so slowly brought down his lips on his friend's. The few inches took too long… his head spun with the sudden adrenaline that pulsed through his veins, and heat shot to his groin faster than he could have imagined as he felt the curves of the other's lips under his own. His fingers clawed unconsciously at the other's nightshirt. "Oh…"

Duncan's body tensed against his own… then lips were parted. The tips of their tongues met tentatively.

Joy spread through Hiih's body in a second shockwave, and he gasped in new air then pushed his lips down again, silently begging for more. _I love you. You know it, I love you. _Duncan's hand grabbed his hair.

"Hiih, we are here for the best swordfighter's training in the galaxy," Duncan uttered as he pulled Hiih backwards, his short pants countering his determined words, "we are not here to indulge ourselves in pleasure. We need our energy for other things."

"It's not pleasure, it's love." The words had left Hiih's mouth before he had even thought about them. They seemed foolish as he felt himself burning in arousal painfully, even as his heart cried out.

The lips that sought his moved in rhythm with his own, desire almost seemed to surge in very the air between them, but they seemed to have moved there of their own accord because Duncan was still pulling him back. "Hiih… that… doesn't matter."

"I love you… you… know it. It's too late, Duncan. Face it. You really don't want to fight me," Hiih breathed heavily, and after sucking in new air: "We always fight side by side."

He thought his victory so near, and he reached out for the next touch but it didn't come.  
Duncan pulled his hands away, then rolled on his back, wiping his mouth. "You're a fool, Hiih. I always knew how you felt. And even though I…" his tone softened, "I love you for it, my heart and soul belong to the Atreides. It would just be… _pleasure_ for me."

The words made Hiih's guts twist, and his eyes burned painfully. But this was not new to him. _Had you been forced to make my choice, you would have left me. But it doesn't matter, Duncan._ "Then just finish this. I'm so hard it will never go away by itself." His voice was slightly muffled.

"Gods, Hiih…" Duncan's tone was somewhere between an uttering of wonder and a reprimand. A long sigh passed his lips, hung in the air for a moment and then he rolled back on his side, keeping enough distance between them. His hand hesitatingly slipped underneath Hiih's blanket.

The hand was warm. Hiih hardly found the time to breathe, in between his tears, and gasps of passion. The strokes were quick and hurried.

A hand settled between his teeth as he came, muffling his loud groan. He bit down. _Bleed, Duncan. Bleed for my silence_, he thought bitterly.

They stilled. Again, there was just the endless, monotonous humming of the rain on the tent. The worst of it seemed to have passed for now, but it never truly stopped. Hiih breathed deeply, calming his heart, lying quietly on his back once more. His friend shifted uncomfortably beside him.

A short, sad laugh left Hiih's mouth. "Troubled, Duncan?"

A strong hand gripped his arm as he reached out, but the hold was not as firm as it could have been. Should have been, to stop Hiih Resser. Duncan trembled as the red-haired peeled away his tense fingers.

"It's too late. _Stop, fighting, me_," the younger told Duncan intently.

Duncan sagged down onto his cot, his hands useless at his sides as Hiih rose, pulled away the dark-haired's blanket and then sat down across his thighs. Duncan did nothing as the other pushed up his nightshirt, and only short, hurried breaths left his mouth as the other lapped at his abdomen. Hiih knew the other wouldn't beg. Duncan trusted him enough to allow himself to be at his mercy, and that said enough. _It makes no difference. I love you._

And Hiih took his chance to show it, taking comfort in Duncan's soft moans. His fellow student would not fight him… not because of pity or a feeling of helplessness, but because of something more. _Your reasoning may be true, your conclusion is a lie. Never lie to the only one that understands you._ When the redhead finally decided it was time to make it come to an end, Duncan shut his mouth and passed into his bliss silently, only the spasms throughout his body and deep breath afterwards betraying his orgasm.

Hiih moved back to his own cot, covered his friend's still heaving body, then faced away from the other as he laid down. "Good night."

A hand reached out over him, searched for his own hand. Their fingers intertwined.

A small smile found it's way on Hiih's face.


End file.
